We Need To Talk

Tomorrow, after almost 10 years with the company, I leave my job.

I leave so that I can sort, clear and pack before moving to Cornwall to start my new life.

To start again.

Today, more so than any other day since John has been dead, I feel the need to talk to him.

To tell him I am leaving my job.

To tell him the dogs and me are leaving London.

To tell him I am nervous.

To tell him I am scared.

To tell him I am emotional (more so than normal!!!)

To tell him I wish, with all my heart, that he was coming too!

I reached for my mobile this evening with the sole intention of calling John.

Then I remembered.

Instead I spoke to Cornwall, to a very, VERY special lady who reminded me that yes, it is scary and nerve racking but it's also very exciting....and John loved exciting!!!!!

Tomorrow night I will be officially unemployed.

6 weeks tomorrow I will be moving out and driving to Cornwall to start my new life.

I am emotional.

I am scared.

I am nervous.

I am excited.